Some times i have a such a bizarre time being alone with myself i just stay busy to avoid getting sucked into the crevices of my psyche...an ocd focus on a pore, a scar, a fingernail. Like a black hole collapsing in on itself.
I scanned in some drawings from a while back ago. The sketchbooks are from the past 3 years ...i try to remember to date things but for me trying to remember is just Forgetting.
going thru the images made me sad bc i used to fill up a sketchbook in a week. now ....i work so much and work makes me tired that i can only do 3 or 4 drawing a week and small ones at that....
The gaining of these last five pounds eradicated so much pain. It is unbelievable. The pain in my hips, jaws, shoulders....It is gone. The bone scraping joint pain is gone. The freezing ice bone pain. Why would you miss pain? How can you miss pain? Maybe i don't miss it, i just am not sure how to live without it.
2 comments:
Nice piece.
our pain becomes us. it's something we can depend upon.
was it something like an eating disorder -- something to distract you?
now that i'm in a pretty good place, the real issues of life look bigger. but it's better than the pain.
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