witch room is green?

So i am moving and i painted my new bedroom green. I love the green. this pic was last weekend, the floor is done now and I will be moving in this weekend.

Just this morning i crept back on the scale and had lost 5 lbs. I was startled but confused. I do not lose weight easily... i have been super stressed but i have been eating. Then i remembered that i also have taken diuretics and laxatives (In my defense, i really felt like i really needed them; i didn't take too many or anything). That must be the reason for the weight fluctuation but at least i am AWARE that this been a hell of a week, and I guess i needed control, too so the little behaviors crept back in.

I need to think more about this control issue...or how it applies to my restricting.

So i am moving this weekend, right, and i got a TON of new confusing assignments at work AND we are shorthanded at work AND another person just quit...the new assignments may be okay once i LEARN how to do them..if i can get D to show me how to do them without him yelling at me. again.( my dept is a dysfunctional family. seriously)

And the boy i had been talking to...well kinda kicked me in the heart...and then TOTALLY ignored me. I think the avoiding me hurt worse than the original kick but..oh well. To him, Im not worth an explanation. Fine, I can deal. i can icanican. ican. :(


So my work life, home life, and "love" life being out of control made me..well drink, smoke and lose some weight. But the good news is i am aware of it and plan to get back on track.

I am sure that i am over reacting about my well being. BUT! Being hyper aware is the only way i know to do this. It is the only way i know how to deal with and overwhelming barrage of emotion and anxiety and not hurt myslef. (i have a mood disorder, yo!.lol)

but im doing it. Im gonna be a green witch in a green room in the house between the river and the oleandars and im gonna be fine.

gonna keep telling myself that...